Am I where I thought I would be at thirty? I'm not sure I can really answer that question. I don't think I ever really looked forward to a specific age with a grand scheme of what my life would be at that very moment. Sure, I had plans and dreams for my future but they were never really age specific. Looking back now, I can't imagine imposing deadlines and unwavering plans onto life when it is really so unpredictable. One of the greatest blessings in life can be that it is so easily changed with each new step you take. The blessings are indeed within the journey.
What I can say is that, at times, when I stop and really think about things that it can seem just a bit surreal. Here I am a (supposedly) responsible adult. Responsible for not only myself but for two small humans, and their education, and a household, and a business, and... The list of responsibilities certainly seems to drag on for quite a while, and while we're in the day to day goings on of it all, everything seems quite normal.
It is only when I stop and really think about it, that it sometimes catches me off guard. It has really been an amazing and blessed journey that has brought me to this point in life. I wouldn't trade any of the little moments that have built my path to exactly where I am right now, as this is exactly where I am meant to be. When I woke this morning to the scampering of little feet and not so quiet whispers going on outside my bedroom door, I was immediately brought into the moment. There was no wondering about the past, nor any pondering the unknown of the future, there was simply a moment to bask in the beauty of what my life is right now.
When I was finally allowed out of my room, I was met with two faces absolutely beaming with pride over all the hard work they had put into making Mama's birthday oh so special. They had worked so hard together to create all the special things that they love to have on their very own birthdays. Seeing how they had pulled together all those special touches that we use on their special days made my heart nearly burst.
The birthday table set with all the favorite pretties and stories, not to mention the letter 'a' removed from Kait's name banner since Mama doesn't have a birthday banner of her own. And dare I say, their favorite part of birthday mornings, a fairy bread breakfast complete with a dinosaur topper and a few remaining Valentine cookies. These loves of mine, they certainly are good to me.
If this wasn't where my past self thought I should end up, I was certainly on the wrong path. This. This is exactly where I am meant to be and I couldn't have asked for a more special birthday.