Three years ago...
It's hard for me to believe (and harder for me to write) that the tiny little baby it that picture above turned three years old today. Three years ago I became a mama for the very first time, and nothing has been the same since. From the moment the nurses placed this precious little girl on my chest I knew I had become a part of something so very special. From that very first instant I knew that the purpose for my life had changed, and changed for the better.
It is my immense pleasure to be the mama to this extrodinary little girl. In nurturing and watching her grow I have grown as a person as well. I am no longer the person that I was before her. She has brought such depth, purpose and joy to my life that I will forever be thankful for. I now experience the world in a whole new light, through the eyes of a child. A brillant, intelligent, thoughtful and curious child.
The above photo is one of my absolute favorite from her infancy because it is so telling. I feel that it so perfectly captures the personality that has emerged from within that tiny girl. Her intensity for all things. She attacks every new experience with a focus and intensity that I have never witnessed before. With her, every movement is deliberate and important. Every action is planned and nothing goes unnoticed. She has a great eye for detail and an incredible memory that never ceases to astonish me. It shows in everything she does from her drawings to her imaginative play to the placement of her toys when she is no longer using them, everything is to her exact specifications. Sometimes her intensity and drive to do things "just so" gets the better of her and in that moment it is my job to step in and try to help her to understand that things do not always have to be perfect and try to show her how to color outside of the lines and soften her desire for perfection. I see too much of myself in that part of her and I want so badly to help to ease the frustration I know she feels when something isn't what she thinks it should be. To help her to roll with what life puts in front of her and realize that imperfections are truly what makes life worth experiencing. It might seem strange to you that I am typing these things about a girl who has just now turned the very young age of three years old, but to those that know her best these words ring true. She is the expression "old soul" personified. She is often surprisingly insightful for someone her age.
And I would not be doing her justice if I didn't right about her humor. She is such a happy and silly girl and brings smiles and laughter to all around her. She is fantastically funny. I relish the stories that she loves to tell and crack up at her funny little jokes. Not always because they are actually funny in a traditional sense but more often because she tells them with such humor and truly believes they are hilarious. Her laughter is so contagious and no one is immune. It doesn't matter how bad of a day you might be having, she can always make you smile.
Her loving nature and desire to take care of anyone and everyone who might need her assistance pushes me to be a more caring person to the world around me. Her kind spirit shines through in her desire to be the care giver to anyone who is hurt or upset. It truly pains her to see others hurt and her gentle soul will cuddle up next to them and do her very best to console them. Just today our neighbor stopped by and hadn't been feeling very well, later in the evening Kinsley told me "We need to take her something to make her happy". No prompting on my part, just from her reflecting on our earlier conversation with said neighbor she felt compelled to do something to make her feel better.
What more could a mama ask for than to have such a thoughtful and wonderful child? I have to say I feel so blessed to be able to call myself her mama and am striving to do my very best to nurture this beautiful soul that God has placed in my care.
Happy Birthday my darling Binkers. I look forward to sharing many more with you.